By Danielle Williams
The senior partner tells me Tuesday I will be going to New York, Thursday through Friday. My husband, also a litigator, is going to Texas Wednesday and may be back home before our son goes to bed on Thursday.
Several phone calls later and after the schedule is adjusted to accommodate an unexpected trip to New York, the senior partner tells me that I am not going to New York after all, and will be on a conference call instead.
All of us have at least two or three of these situations a quarter: Unexpected events that make us wonder when we can stop rearranging schedules and actually enjoy what is planned. We all face the never-ending logistics coordination that makes us question whether having a successful professional career, a meaningful family life and an enjoyable personal life is actually possible.
Aren't there days when you believe that "balance" should be deleted from the dictionary because it truly does not exist?
Whether you are balancing career, children and spouse, or career, dog-training and social life, you can achieve balance. With the right attitude, a workable schedule, and appropriate delegation, we can achieve balance - at least it works for me.
Attitude
1. Maintain Your Convictions: If you want to have a career, a meaningful family life and a happy marriage, you will. Beware of the naysayers, the incredulous looks and those that disagree with your decision to try to achieve balance.
2. Enjoy What You Are Doing: Your time is too precious to waste. Granted, the legal profession does not always present us with exciting projects. We need to enjoy the practice of law, especially if it takes us away from our family.
The same is true for civic commitments. If you do not enjoy participating on one board, there is another board that would love to have you.
3. Be Flexible: In the practice of law, schedules are not our own. When surprised with a last-minute business trip, deposition or meeting, or a rush project, focus on how to work this unexpected event into your schedule.
Don't waste time complaining about late notice. Figure out a way to get the work done. Flexibility is accepting that issues come up unexpectedly and focusing on addressing the issue.
Schedule
1. Framework: I am a believer in writing down what needs to be done, whether for a particular case, a house project, or trial team practice. My framework is one sheet of paper per week with my list of cases and tasks to be completed for each, along with any administrative responsibilities, on the top three-quarters of the page, and my meeting schedule for that week on the bottom.
I prepare it every Friday for the following week. My secretary and members of my practice group have access to that document, as well as my electronic calendar.
2. Know Where You Are Going: You need to be in control of your schedule. When I let my schedule control me, I am a slave to the squeaky wheel or the hot project. Putting out fires is part of the legal profession, but only putting out fires can be exhausting. Plus, between fires, I can address that list of projects.
3. Know Your Spouse's Schedule: My husband and I are both litigators, but with different firms. To avoid both of us being out of town or in early or late meetings on the same day, we tell each other the dates requiring travel or early/late meetings.
Learn To Delegate
1. Train Your Subordinates: I used to laugh when the partner that trained me would say he wanted me "up to speed" so he could go to the beach more often. Now that my schedule balances work and family, I truly understand what he meant.
I need reliable associates to work on cases because (aside from cost issues) when my schedule takes me out of the office for whatever reason, I need to know that the client's needs will be addressed.
2. Trust Your Child Care Provider: Whether you have two-legged or four-legged children, I cannot emphasize enough the absolute need to trust the folks looking after your children. If I cannot trust the people looking after our son when I am at the office, then I will not get anything done, in which case, I might as well stay at home.
3. Rely on Trustworthy Substitutes: In addition to work and family, you may enjoy teaching, coaching or playing any number of things. When my work/family schedule does not mesh with the practice schedule, I ask someone to cover for me.
For example, I coach the Wake Forest trial team. I know that I cannot attend all practices, so the assistant coach covers when I have to be absent. In case we both have conflicts, I have a list of former trial team members who are interested in running practice.
I am sure there are a number of people who are not only eager, but competent to teach your class or coach your team or play your position on the rec-soccer team. You just have to identify them and ask in advance.
As I said, this works for me at the present time. But everything is subject to change and here is hoping that the right attitude and a little flexibility will leave us all with a successful professional career, a meaningful family life and a happy marriage.
Danielle Williams is a litigation partner with Kilpatrick Stockton. She is happily married to a litigator and the proud mother of their 14-month old son. She can be reached at dtwilliams@kilpatrickstockton.com.
ACIH / April 2005
